Date: Sat, 02 Mar 2002 14:18:19 +0900
To: Richard
Subject: Have you heard about my story?
Dear Richard,
I have told my personal story to your wife, so you might know about my problem.
I suddenly felt that you might give a good advice to me. I am sorry to take your time, but I would like to tell you briefly. (I wish I could explain better in English!)
I met HIM when I was 32. He was 25. But unfortunately, I was married. I never knew that there was a REAL partner in the world before I met him. We were attracted each other very strongly, but I could not think we would have our future. He was a very strict man, and I never thought of divorcing, because Stuart's father(J) was a very good man, and I was pregnant, too. Stuart was 3.
I did not see him since then, but after Stuart's brother was born, I became very ill. I never met him but I could feel how much he suffered. Those were really hard days for me. I was nearly dead than alive for about 8 months. But I suppose he suffered even worse because he was a young man.
As I was very ill for long time, I could not help telling J what had happened.
"I can understand your feeling but I cannot do anything." He said.
It was Stuart who saved me. Stuart met HIM when HE came to see me when he was 3, and Stuart liked HIM very much. I cried a lot in front of him at that time. So at night when we went to bed, I said to Stuart,
"I am sorry I cried today."
"Why did you cry, mommy?"
"I wonder why...."
"It is because SOMEONE has come back!"
It was a great shock to me. He was completely right. But how did he know? He was only 3. Stuart knew that HE was my REAL partner.
When he was 5, he suddenly said to his father.
"Mommy is too busy so I need another mother."
J knew that I was suffering, so he thought if he could find anyone who was good to himself and children, he would free me. And Stuart helped his father to find his REAL partner.(She is my very close friend!)
When J told me this, I realized that everyone in this world had their real partner. I had thought that I had to give up my happiness to protect my family's happiness, but that was a complete mistake. I have to be happy myself to make everyone happy. Everyone in the world can be happy if only everyone can find their real partner! It was a very wonderful new vision to me.
Anyway, We were divorced and J had a second marriage with her. There are a lot of funny stories about this but that is not the point. They live very happily together with my second son and another son now.
The problem is the man I love. I have been waiting for him since I divorced 8 years ago. I wrote him a lot of letters, e-mails, but no reply or very few furious replies. There are some telephone calls without saying anything, but there is no proof that it is him. I know he is still single. He is 35 now.
Even though he does not say anything, I can feel that he loves me a lot. I suppose he has not got enough courage to come to see me. He was hurt too badly the first time we met. I think you can imagine how he felt because you are a man.
I am completely stuck. I cannot live without him but there is no way to see him. If I had been single when I met him, I am sure we would have lived very happily together, just like you and your wife. When I saw you, I had a strange feeling that your energy healed my wounded heart, which I never felt before. So I thought you might help us.
I would really like to hear your advice.
Thank you for listening.
Love, Kyoko